To Manage or To Be Managed

Carlos, a 24-year-old man who is a CEO of a big company, woke up at exactly 07:30 for another day as always. He was going to go to work, sit in an office for hours and hours then come home, eat his cold dinner, do some paperwork and go to sleep. He didn’t have any colours in his life. No one to love or to be loved by.

He wasn’t this colourless in high school nor in college. He wouldn’t have a day off. Not from work or study but because he had a party going on every day. He used to be a lot calmer. He had friends, he used to be a fun guy but not anymore. It has been like this since his best friend Luca passed away 2 years ago. Carlos wanted to sell the company for a while. He had buyers too. But he didn’t do it for Lucas’ sake. What would Lucas think if he knew that his best friend of 14 years sold all his hard work for a few thousand dollars? Carlos was overthinking again. Even though he had just woken up, his mind was rushing with thoughts as he started feeling the usual guilt in him raising again. He immediately sensed it was a day exactly like the last 600 days.  He dressed up, put on his usual dark blue tie and left the house. He turned his car’s engine on and started driving without a thought. Once he arrived in his office, he immediately took attendance and weirdly all the staff were here. He couldn’t get angry and shout at anyone.  He talked to all the people and got in his office where he was going to do paper work for 8 hours without anyone talking to him. He was a pro when it came to time management. He always got all his work done just in time, minute to minute, second to second. But this time, things were different. He opened the drawer where all the folders were. He picked out a random folder. In the folder was a file. He opened the file and saw Lucas’ and his picture while starting the company. He felt emotional which was not normal since he usually didn’t feel anything. He felt a tear rolling down his cheek as he got more carried away in the moment. He didn’t like crying. It made him feel powerless but he knew it was best to let it all out.

After a while he stopped crying. He felt alive once again. He wiped his tears away and checked the time. It was 11 PM. He usually left work at 6 PM. The only thing he admired himself was his ability to manage time but now, that was gone. His feelings got his discipline and skill to go away. He left his office and started driving. He had a lot on his mind. He finally realized that he didn’t manage time. He got managed by time. He remembered Lucas’ last text message to him.: “Don’t ever let yourself break down. Keep your guard up. Don’t forget. He who can’t manage time will eventually be managed by time.”

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