I pretty much spend my days worrying either about past or future. Even in those high points of my life I would somehow think about how valuable that time was and I shall never get that moments again, I wasn’t wrong ,but thinking about them instead of appreciating those seconds didn’t help at all.I always and always found ways to weigh myself .I remember even laying in my bed was a torture, I had many anxious night reliving the bad moments writing all these alternative scenarios resonating in my head with me replying to those people in other ways or not replying at all, wondering if that would make a difference. Of course, there was no chance of replaying those moments ,all I got was sleepless nights. I felt like I was the only one having these thoughts, though I believe some of you can identify with me ,or you cannot relate at all, but be honest to yourself.
Think for me for a moment how many times you haven’t eaten that food because you were worried about your ‘how would it affect your weight’ , how many times you stopped yourself from singing and dancing along to a song in public even though you would totally scream on top of your lungs by yourself in a car, because what everyone would say about you or how everyone would look at you was more important than escaping the rush of life for at least two minutes.
These are just examples but we don’t know how to live I believe, probably there are some out there who likes this whole mess , again hats of to them , but I believe we are pushed into this system and you can partially blame human’s nature for that.Don’t you think it is quite funny that with these heavy machineries and services literally improving and getting faster every single day we would have more time for ourselves but somehow it is other way around and now we spend more time worrying about other things…
I know it is intimidating and you can feel overwhelmed and stressed ,you can’t sometimes help but want to get it over with because I and most of the world living in this century feels like too. Maybe I am speaking nonsense but sometimes eating a piece of that cake doesn’t hurt anyone!